It Doesn’t Have to be a Fuck Yes
We’ve all heard it: “If it’s not a fuck yes, it’s a no.”
It sounds wise. Empowered. Even spiritual.
And yes—there’s truth in it.
But if I had waited for my body to be a fuck yes in every important decision I’ve ever made, my life would be so much smaller than it is now.
There are moments when your body will say no because it's scared.
Moments when your nervous system isn’t sure what to do with what you're about to become on the other side of that yes.
Moments when the unfamiliar feels dangerous, even if it’s deeply aligned.
And in those moments, your most powerful choice won’t feel like a fuck yes.
It will feel like a trembling, conscious one.
A choice made at your edge—not beyond your consent, but beyond your comfort.
The Seduction of the “Fuck Yes”
It’s easy to make “fuck yes” a golden rule.
It feels clear, and safe, and self-honoring.
It gives you a quick out anytime something feels uncertain.
But the body isn't always a reliable compass when it's been shaped by trauma, fear, or chronic self-protection.
Sometimes the body says no because it’s bracing. Not because it’s wise, but because it’s afraid of change.
Some of the most expansive moments in my life came when I said yes even while my body trembled.
Not in override, but in reverent partnership—with fear present, but not in charge.
When Maybe Really Is a No
There’s another saying in the spiritual community: “If you’re a maybe, you’re a no.”
And sometimes? That’s true.
Sometimes maybe is just your no in disguise—dressed up in politeness or wrapped in performance.
Sometimes maybe means:
I’m trying not to hurt anyone.
I’m deferring to someone else’s desire.
I’m looking for an excuse to exit without taking responsibility for the truth.
And sometimes, being a maybe is actually the most aligned no you’re ready to speak aloud.
In those moments, the work is in owning it.
Clarity is kindness.
Sovereignty is self-respect.
Even when your no is quiet, it still deserves to be heard.
The Sacred Power of the Conscious Yes
Now here’s where the real magic lives: in the conscious yes.
Not the yes that screams from your genitals.
Not the yes that pours in because everything feels safe and certain.
But the yes that holds both the desire and the fear.
The yes that says:
“I choose this.
I choose this and the edge it brings.
I choose the trembling part of me, and the wise part of me, together.”
This is what true consciousness is.
Not spiritual bypass.
Not forcing the body.
Not pretending you’re ready when you’re not.
It’s the sacred act of holding duality.
Of being big enough to say: I see the fear, and I choose the path anyway.
The duality is the edge.
And holding it—without collapse or contraction—is a form of alchemy.
It recodes the pattern. It raises the frequency.
And it changes you.
This is how we grow. Not by waiting for everything to feel good… but by becoming the one who can walk through the fire and remain whole.
How to Discern the Difference
Here’s the most important piece:
Why are you not a yes?
This is the moment of initiation. The place where fear and honesty meet.
Ask yourself:
Am I not a yes because I’m actually a no?
Because my truth is saying no clearly, and I just don’t want to disappoint someone?
Because I’ve learned to be polite instead of direct?
Or…
Am I not a yes because I’m afraid of what I might become on the other side of this choice?
Am I standing in front of a portal, calling it a danger zone, when it’s actually my growth edge?
Is my ego terrified that a part of it will die if I say yes—and is that exactly what needs to happen?
Sometimes the deepest yes is the one that challenges your identity. The one that invites you to grow beyond your old safety.
This is why discernment matters.
Only you can feel the difference between a no that honors you, and a no that limits you.
So no, it doesn’t have to be a fuck yes. It just has to be a conscious one.
One rooted in your awareness.
Held by your inner clarity.
Aligned with your deeper truth—even when your body isn’t sure how to receive it yet.
Because sometimes, the most powerful yes isn’t the one that feels good.
It’s the one that feels true.
Even when you have to walk through fear to arrive.
That’s not a fuck yes.
That’s an alchemical yes.
And that is where your next level is waiting.
In conscious sovereignty,
-Sharon
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